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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30008667">States and Skates</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aelinsfox/pseuds/aelinsfox'>aelinsfox</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>All For The Game - Nora Sakavic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Hockey, Alternate Universe - No Exy (All For The Game), American Sign Language, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, British Sign Language, Families of Choice, Gender Dysphoria, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jeremy is Neil's foster brother, Minor Character Death, Multi, Nathan is still shitty though, No Butcher of Baltimore, No Mafia, Selectively Mute Neil Josten, Sibling Neil Josten, Sign Language, So is Mary, Stuart is only Mentioned, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Neil Josten, Transphobia, Underage Rape/Non-con, Vixen Neil Josten, it’s implied and referenced</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:54:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,645</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30008667</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aelinsfox/pseuds/aelinsfox</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Natalie Wesninski was born in Baltimore, Maryland on January 19, 2002. Natalie was assigned female at birth but he was a boy. Neil Wesninski had known this for sure since he was eight-years-old and was thrown out of his house and put into the foster care system and shipped to California where he remained in the system for five years before being moved to Palmetto, South Carolina to live with another family.</p><p>Maybe they will be different than the rest.</p><p>* * *<br/>Where Neil was put into foster care after coming out to his parents as transgender.<br/>* * *<br/>READ TAGS before reading // CURRENTLY ON HIATUS</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Allison Reynolds/Renee Walker (All For The Game), Alvarez/Laila Dermott, Andrew Minyard &amp; The Foxes, Jean Moreau &amp; The Trojans, Jeremy Knox &amp; Neil Josten, Jeremy Knox &amp; The Trojans (All For The Game), Jeremy Knox/Jean Moreau, Mary Hatford/Nathan Wesninski, Matt Boyd/Danielle "Dan" Wilds, Neil Josten &amp; Original Character(s), Neil Josten &amp; The Foxes (All For The Game), Neil Josten &amp; The Trojans (All For The Game), Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Nicky Hemmick/Erik Klose, Original Character/Original Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>110</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>PLEASE PLEASE READ THE TAGS FOR TRIGGER WARNINGS!!</p><p>of course, i’ll put individual tw’s for each chapter in the notes prior to it but they’re just an added caution. the real TW are the tags so please, READ THOSE. and if you get triggered by anything mentioned, please don’t read it. I don’t want any of you beautiful people getting triggered. </p><p>Love y’all🤍</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Neil meets the Knoxs.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>NEW STORY!! okay so (obviously) this is a new story and this idea actually came to me in a dream so... yeah, lmao.</p><p>Enjoy!</p><p>Trigger Warnings for this chapter: </p><p>implied past underage rape, implied past self-harm, implied/referenced past transphobia, past gender dysphoria, past denial of one's gender (this is included in transphobia but i feel like this just needed it's own tw).</p><p>please let me know in the comments if i missed any because i'll gladly add them!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Natalie Wesninski was born in Baltimore, Maryland on January 19, 2002. Natalie was assigned female at birth but he was a boy. Neil Wesninski had known this for sure since he was eight-years-old and was thrown out of his house and put into the foster care system and shipped to California where he remained in the system for five years before being moved to Palmetto, South Carolina to live with another family.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe they will be different than the rest.</p><p> </p><p>”California might not be the best place for you,” Neil’s social worker, Sydney, told him as they waited to board the plane to Colombia, South Carolina. He didn’t say anything back, though she knew not to take it personally.</p><p> </p><p>”The Knoxs are good people,” she insisted. “They’ll be good for you, Neil. I promise.” He continued to stare at her blankly and unblinking. She had said the same thing before the Millers and the Youngs and the two dozen other families we had lived within the last five years. He’d never stayed in a house longer than a month, save for one house. </p><p> </p><p>Neil wouldn’t think about the Johnsons. Not now, not ever again. Even if they were the reason his chest was now flat. Even if they were the only family to have ever called him Neil and who insisted he was a boy and their foster son. </p><p> </p><p>He wouldn’t. He couldn’t.</p><p> </p><p>He signed, “You said that last time. And every time before that.”</p><p> </p><p>”I know,” she signed back. “But both parents are transgender themselves and have two biological children: a son, and a daughter. Their son, Jeremy is about your age, and their daughter, Sophia is around seven. Both parents say that their children are beyond supportive of them.”</p><p> </p><p>More unblinking stares and another sigh pulled from the woman’s lungs.</p><p> </p><p>”And,” she signed, “The entire family knows sign language. ASL, specifically.”</p><p> </p><p>Oh. Now that, that was new. He’d never stayed with a family who knew sign language though the Johnsons- No. Neil cut off the thought before it could progress.</p><p> </p><p>“Why?” He signed.</p><p> </p><p>“Sophia is selectively mute, as well. She feels safe at home so she’ll talk then, but in places where there are a lot of people, she can get extremely anxious. They learned sign language so they could communicate.”</p><p> </p><p>”Oh.”</p><p> </p><p>A smile pulled at Sydney’s pink lips, her crow feet next to her brown eyes pulled.</p><p> </p><p>”Now boarding, Flight 218 to Colombia, South Carolina. Now boarding, Flight 218 to Colombia, South Carolina,” a robotic voice rang through the speakers and Neil pulled his duffel bag closer to himself protectively. </p><p> </p><p>As they boarded and people pushed themselves up against Neil, his skin crawled with u wanted hands and other body parts touching him against his pleas. He hurried to their seats in the back where it was just the two of them and Neil was against the window, peering out the blind. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m scared,” he breathed out, his voice weak and hoarse from disuse. “I’m so close to-”</p><p> </p><p>”I know, Neil. The Knoxs assured me they don’t go anywhere near Baltimore. Not unless it’s for a hockey game,” Sydney said and gently patted his knee reassuringly.</p><p> </p><p>He looked at her, his eyes wide with glee. “Hockey?”</p><p> </p><p>”Yes, dear. Jeremy plays for his high school. The even better part is that Palmetto High has a figure skating team. You get to participate in competitions and everything.”</p><p> </p><p>”Can I do that?”</p><p> </p><p>”Of course.”</p><p> </p><p>A quick upturn of his lips and the plane was taking off, the ground underneath them quickly becoming air. Neil took his earbuds that he'd bought at the airport and plugged them into his phone, also bought at the airport, and downloaded Spotify before shuffling a random playlist and slowly drifting off to sleep.</p><p> </p><p>Sydney slowly woke Neil up seven hours later as the plane was about to land by taking out his earbud. He felt the movement and quickly shot up, bleary eyes shakingly taking in his surroundings.</p><p> </p><p>"Where are we?" He signed.</p><p> </p><p>"We're just over Palmetto, now. We're about five minutes away from landing," she told him as the seatbelt light above them went off. The landing gears slowly came out of the bottom of the plane and it tilted. Neil had to swallow quickly so that his ears didn't pop.</p><p> </p><p>If Los Angeles, California, was hot, then Colombia was its twin; Neil quickly realized as he waited in Arrivals for his new foster family, Sydney still at his side. She'd see him to his foster house and make sure he had everything he needed before leaving back to California.</p><p> </p><p>"I think that's them," she said and pointed to a family of four, all tall and blond. The sign that the young man, Jeremy Knox, apparently was holding read, THE KNOXS in huge, bold letters.</p><p> </p><p>"Can we get this over with?" He signed and she nodded as the pair walked over to them. </p><p> </p><p>"Ruby Knox?" Sydney asked as they got within hearing distance.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s me,” a woman around thirty said. Her blonde hair and blue eyes were startling and Neil had to look away at his feet. He nervously hit his lip as Sydney and Ruby talked. </p><p> </p><p>“Hey, Neil, right?” A hand touched his shoulder and Neil flinched away. “Shit. I’m so sorry um- I’m Jeremy. I’m sixteen, almost seventeen, and I’m your new foster brother,” he smiled sheepishly and Neil looked up. </p><p> </p><p>“Hello?” He signed nervously, his hands moving slower than normal. Yet, Jeremy smiled and Neil had to look away. Too bright, dammit.</p><p> </p><p>“Selectively mute, right? I’m sorry I’m super nervous and when I’m nervous I talk and ramble and-”</p><p> </p><p>“Jere,” a small girl signed from next to Jeremy, Sophia, then. “I think he gets it,” she turned towards Neil. “You do get that, right?” A nod was her answer which made her smile.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Sydney said. “Neil these are Ruby and Adrian. I see you’ve already met Jeremy and Sophia. So, are we ready?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah!” Sophia said happily. </p><p> </p><p>These people smiled too much and were happy too often, dammit. Neil signed such to Sydney once Adrian began showing them the way to the Knox’s car and her reply was, “Give them a chance.” Neil might have to get a new social worker if she didn’t stop being right. Neil hates being wrong. Sophia turned towards Neil and signed.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi.”</p><p> </p><p>“Hello.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m Sophia. Ignore Jeremy, he can be super annoying.”</p><p> </p><p>“Neil. And yeah, I gathered.”</p><p> </p><p><em> Another smile </em>. “I like you,” she declared. “Selectively mute solidarity?”</p><p> </p><p>“Depends. How annoying are you?” Sophia snorted.</p><p> </p><p>“Depends. Ask Jere and he’ll say I’m the most annoying thing on the planet. Ask my parents and they’ll say I’m the sweetest thing to have ever walked this earth.”</p><p> </p><p>Neil couldn’t help the tinge of envy that swam through his chest. He remembers when his mom would have said that about him, back before he came out to her. When she would read him bedtime stories about princesses being rescued by princes and getting married and live happily ever after and all that.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Avery</em>,” she used to call him. Thinking about his dead middle name made him nauseous and he quickly threw the thought away. <em>Abram</em>, he told himself. <em>Your middle name is Abram. You are a boy and always have been.</em> <em>Your name is Neil Abram Wesninski and </em><b><em>you</em></b> <b><em>are a boy</em></b>.”</p><p> </p><p>“So Neil,” Adrian said. “We were gonna go to the hardware store before bringing you back to our house. Is that okay?”</p><p> </p><p>Neil stopped in his tracks momentarily, long enough for them to notice but not long to say anything as he quickly nodded and climbed into the way back of the black Volvo XC90 alongside Sydney. </p><p> </p><p>“What are you guys getting there? At the hardware store?” Sydney asked when Neil signed the question to her. </p><p> </p><p>“A lock for Neil’s room. We thought it appropriate that since he’s fifteen he should have his own space as well as a lock. Where he can feel safe.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you,” Neil signed and looked out the window to take in his surroundings as the social worker relayed his response. </p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to thank us, Neil. Both Jeremy and Sophia have locks on their doors and it’s only fair that you have one as well. I was a foster kid, too, before I got adopted and I always felt safer when there was a lock on my door,” Ruby said. “I feel that it’s just foster decency to give your child a lock on their door.”</p><p> </p><p>“No one’s ever done that before,” he signed to Sydney who, again, told the car. It was a lie, of course, because one family <em> had </em> done that before. Neil pushed them and Rebecca’s loving smiles and warm hugs far away from him, the scars on his wrists burning with memory.</p><p> </p><p>“Soph says she approves and wants us to keep him,” Jeremy stated after a silence came over the car.</p><p> </p><p>That startled Neil though he didn’t know why it should. She’d said that she liked him earlier and came up with the ‘Selectively Mute Solidatiry’ thing, but <em> keep him </em> like <em> adopt him </em>? The thought was almost laughable and that... wasn’t normal. Families didn’t want to adopt him because of his silence, though many tried to abuse that silence for their own pleasure. He stayed silent with his hands still on his lap as he looked out the window.</p><p> </p><p>Not long after that, they pulled up to a Home Depot and made their way to the lock and keys section, “Pic whichever lock you want,” Adrian said as he gestured to the large array of keys. “It doesn’t matter the cost,” he said when Neil went over to one of the cheaper ones. Neil looked at him suspiciously but went over to one of the locks with a deadbolt that locks from the inside only and looks like it’d make a lot of noise if someone tried to force it open or pick the lock.</p><p>“Can I get this one?” He signed and when both Ruby and Adrian nodded, again with those too-bright smiles plastered on their faces, he grabbed it and walked up to the desk where the employee was making a key for it. </p><p> </p><p>“Thanks,” he signed to no one in particular when the Knox’s paid for them. </p><p> </p><p>Afterward, they all went to the grocery store where they questioned Neil about his likes and dislikes in regards to food as well as allergies. He’d shrugged and nodded his way through most of the aisles, shaking his head vigorously at vegetables and sweets while he nodded at fruits and some other foods.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you,” he signed when they got back into the car, Sydney saying it aloud for him once again. </p><p> </p><p>“You really don’t need to thank us, Neil. We’re doing our job as your foster parents, truly. Please don’t thank us.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay. I’m sorry,” Sydney sent him a sympathetic look that he quickly glared at.</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to apologize, either. You didn’t do anything wrong, okay?”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay.”</p><p> </p><p>Jeremy looked back towards him, smiled, and signed: “So, Neil. Do you play hockey?” Neil shook his head and a small frown found itself plastered on the older teen’s face. “Do you ice skate at all?”</p><p> </p><p>“I used to figure skate,” he signed and Jeremy smiled. “My high school has a figure skating team. You could try out in the winter? My friends and I are meeting at the arena tomorrow to scrimmage if you want to come and just skate in another rink.”</p><p> </p><p>“I can?”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course. In fact, I think my friends are really gonna like you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay… thanks.”</p><p> </p><p>Sydney smiled at him when Jeremy turned back around, “I’m glad you’re reaching out,” she signed and Neil had to control his eye roll. He was fifteen, not a ten-year-old kid anymore, he didn’t need pushing to interact. If he wanted to speak or hang out with someone, he would. He doesn’t need people hanging over him, dammit.</p><p> </p><p>Neil didn’t know what he expected the Knox’s house to look like but the three-story, porched in, mid-century modern home was not it. The exterior painting was a common eggshell with the interiors consisting of mostly blacks, light browns, and whites with a few succulents around here-and-there. No, Neil didn’t expect this at all.</p><p> </p><p>Adrian and Jeremy led him and Sydney up the stairs while Sophia and Ruby made dinner for the six of them. A white door that led to a gray painted room that had a bed with all-black bedding and succulent plants hanging near the window was their destination. </p><p> </p><p>“This is your room, Neil, Jeremy’s is right next door with Sophia’s across the hall. Mine and Ruby’s room is upstairs. We can give you a full tour after dinner if you want,” Adrian said kindly. Neil nodded sheepishly as he took in his new room, he doubted he’d last longer than the summer with them, though. Either they decide they don’t want him anymore or a shoe drops and he sacrifices himself to hold on to one of the only good things in his life. He refuses to let the Knoxs become the Johnsons, no, he promised himself never to let that happen to him again.</p><p> </p><p>And if it did, well, Neil would leave before it could.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank y'all for so much for reading.</p><p>I'm hoping to update every Friday or Saturday as I do with my other work, 'Night is the Raven, Day is the Fox.' Which I'm updating either today (Friday) or tomorrow (Saturday) if you haven't already checked it out.</p><p>i would also like to say that i myself am not ftm or mtf, selectively mute, nor have i been in foster care but i will try to write this as accurately as possible from what i've read about other's experiences with transphobia, gender dysphoria, etc.</p><p>Okay, that's it... i think. Love y'all, stay safe🤍</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Neil meets the Kits</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi! new update (and schedule, look at the end-notes for more info)</p><p>trigger warnings: implied homophobia (disgust of possible gay relationship), implied child abuse (mention of shitty foster homes), transphobia (accidentally deadnaming) </p><p>i think that's it for tw's but if you find any more, please comment and i'll add them.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Neil’s first night at the Knox’s was strangely uneventful. Ruby had made a delicious chicken parmigiana which Neil ate greedily, not remembering the last time he had hot food, let alone a home-cooked meal. Jeremy had frowned slightly at him but didn’t say anything which he was grateful for.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil and I are going to the rink, tomorrow,” Jeremy had announced to his family. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ruby had smiled, “That’s good. Do you play hockey, Neil?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” he’d signed. “But I used to figure skate, though.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You should try out for Palmetto’s team. They need more male figure skaters,” she’d replied and Neil had nodded and gone back to eating.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After a restless night of sleep in his new room behind a closed locked door, Neil was in an arena for the first time in years. The first thing he noticed when Jeremy pulled up in front of the building was its size. Jeremey had said that the arena was used by the local college for their hockey games but the high school used them as well. It also had five ice rinks; one for figure skating, two for hockey, and two for public use. Neil felt that the public should get one ice rink while figure skating got the other but kept his comments to himself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My friends are already inside, so let’s go?” Jeremy asked and, when Neil nodded, walked towards inside. “This is skate rental, don’t worry there are a bunch of communal skates for figure skating that you can borrow. Um, the locker rooms are over there,” he said while gesturing across the room. “Here, I’ll show you to the skating rink but if you wanna meet my friends first?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Um, yeah, sure,” Neil signed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, cool,” he smiled. “Follow me and we’ll change out.” Neil followed his foster brother through the lobby and into a locker room lined with blinding orange lockers. “We’re called the Kits, since PSU, the local university, are the Foxes. And Kits are baby foxes… okay,” he chuckled weakly at the end. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How many of your friends are gonna be here?” Neil signed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe a dozen of them? The whole team isn’t coming, but that’s because some of the guys are assholes.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Any girls on the team?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yeah! There are Allison and Natalie,” Neil flinched at his deadname, Jeremy noticed this and frowned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Deadname,” Neil signed and Jeremy immediately began to panic, which if Neil laughed, it would’ve been at that moment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shit, I’m so sorry. Well, there’s her but everyone calls her by her middle name, Renee. So I’ll make sure everyone calls her Renee around you. There’s also Danielle but she likes being called Dan, as well as Sara and Laila. Don’t worry, they’re super cool, well Allison can be a bitch sometimes but she’s a good centerman.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Knox! Let’s go, bro,” someone called from the distance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s Matt, he and Jean are our best defensemen.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil followed Jeremy through the exit of the locker room after he changed into his sweater, with a vest, and leggings. He brought his skates with him, which had surprised Jeremy but Neil always brought his skates, even through the numerous foster homes he’d been in, his skates had traveled with him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who’s this?” The same voice from before, Matt, asked when the pair exited the locker rooms. There were eleven people, six guys, and five girls, all decked out in their respective hockey gear. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is Neil, he’s my new foster brother.” Neil pursed his lips in more of a grimace than a smile and waved awkwardly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If it isn’t Monsieur Rabbit,” A familiar voice called out in Russian and Neil froze before turning to the source of the voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Drew?” He signed in British Sign Language. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who else?” He signed back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I missed you,” he signed and everyone looked on, confused. Neil may or may not have taken a bit of pleasure in the expressions on their faces as he walked to Andrew and took off his helmet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I hate you,” he said in Russian and Neil chuckled lightly before replying in the same language. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Russian was safe, it made his voice deeper when he spoke it as opposed to his usual higher-pitched voice. Russian was safe. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Andrew</span>
  </em>
  <span> was safe. No one was going to hurt him with Andrew around. Neil felt safe with his friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Every time you say that I believe you less and less.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew scowled as he grabbed his helmet from Neil's grip: “No one fucking asked you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil rolled his eyes, smiled slightly, and sat down next to his friend. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You two know each other?” Jeremy asked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Knox, every unwanted foster child knows each other,” Andrew commented, partially sarcastic.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re not in hockey gear,” one of the guys said, he was next to one of the girls and had jet-black hair and stormy gray eyes. Neil held up his figured skates in answer. “Oh,” he said dumbly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay… so Neil, I guess you already know Andrew. Next to him are Nicky, Aaron and, Kevin,” he pointed to each person and while Nicky beamed and smiled at him, the others didn’t even spare him a glance. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Good</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Neil thought. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Over there are Matt, Dan, Renee, Allison, and Seth,” he said before signing, “Seth’s a bigoted asshole so be careful around him,” Neil would take that warning with the caution it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And here are Jean, Laila, and Sara,” he said before clapping his hands and pointing towards the figure skating rink. “Andrew can show you how to set up in there,” he said as he and his friends, save for Seth, Aaron, and Kevin before waved him goodbye and headed out onto the ice to start drills. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go Rabbit,” Andrew said in English before walking down the hall to another ice rink which Neil assumed was the one he was going to use. Thankfully, when they got there it was empty, and Neil hooked up Andrew’s phone to the speaker after being shown how to and played their playlist. “I hate you so much,” Andrew told Neil as </span>
  <em>
    <span>Pierre </span>
  </em>
  <span>by </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ryn Weaver</span>
  </em>
  <span> began playing through the speakers. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Our song</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Neil thought happily as he skated around the rink.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil smiled at the familiar claim as he called out, “You missed me, Drew. Admit it,” Andrew skated towards him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Never,” Andrew whispered as soon as was close enough. “Yes or no?” he asked and Neil thought about it which didn’t take very long at all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” he whispered as the former leaned down to kiss him and Neil lost all sense of reality as he got lost in Andrew’s mouth for a few precious moments. They hadn’t seen each other, let alone kiss the other, in almost two years and Neil was desperate for him. “Skate with me?” He asked when he pulled away, out of breath and face flushed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have a scrimmage to get to. Kevin’s gonna get pissy if I’m not there in goal.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who are the other goalies?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Renee and Dermott,” he said and clarified when Neil looked at him confused, “Laila.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. What time are y’all done? I could come to watch when I’m done with my routine?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t fucking know, whenever one of us gets frostbite.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil snorted, “You’re not serious,” but his expression dropped when he saw the seriousness in his friend’s face. “Okay, then. Maybe I’ll add something to my shit then.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew rolled his eyes, “Junkie,” he said fondly before placing a kiss on Neil’s forehead and exiting the rink, leaving Neil alone to execute his routine so it’s flawless.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Andrew sighed as he left his friend alone in the figure skating rink to his skating-junkie tendencies. He’d have to check on him in an hour to make sure he wasn’t over-doing it but that was in an hour. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Andrew skated onto the ice, his teammates froze in their drills and Knox leaned on his stick. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You know my brother,” he mused, a dopey smile on his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Foster brother,” Andrew corrected him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do you know him?” Aaron asked and wasn’t that interesting. His clone usually never cared about him or his life before their meeting. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Foster care.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What are the two of you like… dating?” Seth asked in disgust. Andrew stared at him blankly before snapping. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No. But, we shared several shitty foster homes so we trust each other. Unfortunate that it’s such a strange concept to you.” Andrew mentally cursed himself, even with almost two years apart, Neil’s rebellious mouth still influenced him and his own words. Andrew was going to kill Neil. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I couldn’t understand what you two were signing and I’m fluent in ASL. What was that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“American isn’t the only type of sign language,” Andrew said as he skated towards the goal where Renee was standing. She smiled at him serenely, the idiot, she knew what he felt about Neil and how protective of him that Andrew was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know but, what kind of sign language was that?” Knox inquired</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“British,” Moreau said and Andrew whipped his gaze to him. If he understood what they were signing- “I recognized a few of the letters,” the French bastard said. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And that language? I’ve never heard you talk in it before,” Nicky said. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Russian,” Andrew said before banging his stick on the goal post. He motioned for Renee to get out of the goal as he got ready to stand there, only swatting away pucks when they were too close to hitting his body. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you frozen yet?” Andrew shouted as he walked into the figure skating rink an hour later to see Neil completing a triple Axel jump and </span>
  <em>
    <span>Experience</span>
  </em>
  <span> by </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ludovico Einaudi</span>
  </em>
  <span> finished on the speakers. The latter smiled at him as he finished and skated over to him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Neil said though he sniffed and his cheeks were flushed red from the cold.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You need warmer clothes,” Andrew said and Neil rolled his eyes before smiling. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m from California. We don’t do cold weather there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go,” he said and when the junkie frowned, he rolled his eyes and picked up the teen easily and didn’t let him down despite Neil’s quiet shrieks and laughs. Andrew would make it his life’s mission to hear that sound forever. He carried him into the locker where he threw a heated blanket as well as gloves and earmuffs at the idiot. “Put those on,” he said and walked out. Neil came out not long after, wrapped up in a warm blanket, earmuffs, and gloves in the middle of July. Andrew would laugh if he had it in him but he could tell Neil saw the content and amusement in his eyes since the emotions reflected themselves in Neil’s icy blue orbs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come on,” he said and led Neil to the bleachers of the hockey rink before skating back down to the ice. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Neil would be lying if he said that watching Andrew play hockey and </span>
  <em>
    <span>play</span>
  </em>
  <span> while his teammates watched in a mix of joy, amusement, and frustration as he shut down the goal and didn’t let a single point from either of the wingers in. A spark of pride alighted itself in Neil’s chest knowing that they helped get the other where they are today and that one wouldn’t be alive without the other. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil had killed some of Andrew’s former foster brothers and foster fathers and Andrew had given Neil protection from his own, even killing a few. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yes</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Neil thought. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We’d have offed ourselves off before giving others the chance to destroy us.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>We saved each other</em>
  </b>
  <span>, Neil thought pridefully asked he watched Andrew walk off of the rink and into the locker room so they could go to lunch afterward. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This could be a good place, Neil realized with a sense of euphoria. A home. Neil needed… no, Neil </span>
  <b>wanted</b>
  <span> a home. He wanted to belong and he wanted Palmetto to be that place; with Andrew and with Jeremy, when he concluded that he wasn’t a threat, with Sophia and her dumb Selectively Mute Solidarity things. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil smiled to himself as he got into the front seat of Andrew’s GS and they drove off to lunch. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Palmetto, South Carolina could be home.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I decided that I'm going to be updating this story on Wednesdays.</p><p>Thank you so much for reading! </p><p>As always, kudos and feedback/comments are always greatly appreciated.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Andrew and Neil skating and revealing secrets</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>new update! im sorry for missing yesterday's update and uploading a day late but i may or may not (i 100% did) underestimated the amount of hw i'd have to finish and wasn't able to finish writing it.</p><p>tw's: implied/referenced past and underage rape, mention of past torture (knives), mention of self-harm (both past and current), implied/referenced past child abuse, (kind of) description of the foster care system</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had taken nearly a month of pestering for Neil to convince Andrew to join him on the ice and skate like they once did, all those years ago before anyone had ever hurt them. Well, that wasn’t true but Andrew didn’t need to know that. Now, it was August and school started in less than a week and Neil knew he most likely wasn’t going to enjoy it.</p><p> </p><p>He knew it, especially when, yesterday, Jeremy told Neil that the entire team was going to be there practicing for the day. Of course, Neil didn’t necessarily care because he didn’t pay much attention to anyone besides Jeremy or Andrew, but when he walked out of the locker room and locked eyes with Ichirou and Riko Moriyama, both decked out in hockey gear, Neil knew he was going to hate high school at Palmetto High.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew had, luckily, noticed Neil’s growing panic before it could spiral into anything more and walked him over to the figure skating rink, his arm wrapped around Neil’s shoulder. </p><p> </p><p>“How do you know the Moriyamas?” Andrew asked when they were out of both hearing and sight range.</p><p> </p><p>“Remember how I told you that after my parents threw me out and I went to England to live with my uncle, Stuart, but we were in a car accident a few months later and he died so I was sent back to the states and I was put with some friends of my parents?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, but what does this have to do with Riko and Ichirou Moriyama?”</p><p> </p><p>“They were those family friends,” Neil said after a moment of silence.</p><p> </p><p>“You said they didn’t hurt you but I’m guessing they did, by your reaction?”</p><p> </p><p>Neil swallowed and looked anywhere but Andrew: “Yeah,” he whispered. “Ichirou… touched me and Riko had a fondness of knives and testing them on people. Kengo was just cruel and Tetsuji has a cane that he doesn’t need and uses for other purposes.”</p><p> </p><p>Neil felt more than saw Andrew’s anger. Not towards him, though maybe some of it was because Neil hadn’t told him about them and what they’d done to him. Neil looked up, expecting to see Andrew but he didn’t and, when he looked around, realized with growing horror that Andrew had gone back towards the hockey rink. Probably to maim Riko and Ichirou.</p><p> </p><p>“Fuck,” Neil whispered to himself before he ran, following the sound of yelling and bodies being thrown into walls.</p><p> </p><p>“You touch him, let alone look at him, and I will kill you and it will be painful and long. Do you understand me?” Andrew asked Ichirou slowly, his voice tight with so many emotions, as he choked him against the wall.</p><p> </p><p>“Natalie,” Riko said in Japanese. “Be a good little girl and tell your mutt to back off my brother before I make him back off.”</p><p> </p><p><b>Neil </b>hated how he flinched at <b>his </b>deadname and his assigned sex being mention in front of others, even if they couldn’t understand. <b>He </b>hated how the not-so-empty threat had him walking towards Andrew slowly, murmuring in Russian as he walked.</p><p> </p><p>“Andrew? He’s not worth it. Okay? Let him go?” Neil asked in quiet Russian. “He’s not worth it Drew.”</p><p> </p><p>“But you are,” Andrew replied and Neil froze his hand over his shoulder, ignoring the way Neil’s skin crawled being so close to Ichirou. “I should kill him. I will kill him.”</p><p> </p><p>“Drew,” Neil forced out in English. “You’re no use to anyone in juvie. Again.” Neil allowed for his slight British accent to show through more, forcing his voice an octave lower and making it sound a bit more masculine.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew let Ichirou go: “I hate you,” he said and walked away, back towards the figure skating rink and Neil quickly followed after him, ignoring the looks that Jeremy and the other Kits sent him and ignoring Jeremy calling his name. </p><p> </p><p>Jeremy had never heard his voice in English before today, none of the Kits had. Neil hadn’t felt safe enough to speak in front of them, partly in fear of them calling him shit he’d been hearing since he was eight years old and words that brought back memories more painful than the knives Riko used to sink into his ten-year-old flesh.</p><p> </p><p>“Andrew,” Neil began as he saw Andrew skating around the rink. He was performing a routine that the pair had come up with when Neil was twelve, before the Johnson for Neil and before juvie for Andrew, back when life was simpler and mildly enjoyable.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t, Abram.”</p><p> </p><p>“Drew.”</p><p> </p><p>“No, Neil. I should’ve killed him.”</p><p> </p><p>“If you’d done that you would go to juvie, possibly adult jail, and I’d be alone. Again.”</p><p> </p><p>Andrew took a deep breath before skating back towards Neil and only cupping his face in the blond’s hands at his nod: “Anyone else since I was in juvie? Or before that?”</p><p> </p><p>“Once,” Neil said. “He was my foster brothers in one of my most recent homes.</p><p> </p><p>“Who? I will kill him.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know you can, Drew, but I want to do it myself.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Andrew said and that was the end of the conversation.</p><p> </p><p>Neil enjoyed that about Andrew and their conversations; neither of them forces to other to talk about a subject that’s potentially triggering, save for the times they need names for who to kill. It was easy; ever since the pair had met in that one shitty San Diego foster home when Neil was eleven, Andrew twelve, it had been easy. As easy as it could be for two foster children, anyways.</p><p> </p><p>“Fifteen-Four?” Neil asked after he tied his skates back on. He loved the routine that they had created two years ago, just months before Andrew went to juvie.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew considered the routine in his head: "You're top."</p><p> </p><p>Neil smiled, "Good. I wouldn't want to be crushed by your muscle mass otherwise."</p><hr/><p>Jeremy and some of the others came looking for them four hours later when Neil and Andrew were running through a routine. It was a different one, where Andrew threw Neil up in the air in a corkscrew and the latter landed on his right skate after flipping out of the corkscrew in a double Axel. </p><p> </p><p>"You're shit at throwing me, Drew," Neil said to Andrew in English, not knowing the others were there.</p><p> </p><p>"You're shit at jumping, Abram," Andrew retorted.</p><p> </p><p>"Holy shit," Jeremy said and both skaters turned to the noise, Neil's body tense in surprise.</p><p> </p><p>"You talk," Nicky said. "I like it. Your voice, I mean. The innocence in it is just... adorable."</p><p> </p><p>"Nothing about me is innocent," Neil signed in ASL before he skated off the rink, Andrew glaring at the small group of the first Kits Neil had met as they skated past. Once off the rink, Neil quickly put his guards over his blades and untied his skates.</p><p> </p><p>"Since when are you a figure skater?" Aaron asked his twin.</p><p> </p><p>"Since I was nine," Andrew said and put his guards over his own blades.</p><p> </p><p>"Nine? But why do you play hockey?" Jean asked next.</p><p> </p><p>"I learned it in juvie."</p><p> </p><p>"You were in juvie?"</p><p> </p><p>Neil snorted from beside the blond: "They don't know?" He asked in Russian.</p><p> </p><p>"Nicky, Aaron, and Kevin do. Just them, though."</p><p> </p><p>Neil's eyebrows rose high on his forehead before he chuckled lightly. "We were gonna hang out at Jere's place if you guys wanna come?" Laila asked. </p><p> </p><p>"I do live there," Neil signed and Jeremy laughed. Neil rolled his eyes at the familiar sound but Jean's gray eyes lit up as he looked at Jeremy as if he had hung the Sun. Neil filed away that information for later. "You coming?" He signed to Andrew in BSL. He nodded and put his skates away though Neil didn't miss the sparkle in his hazel eyes dimming when he put his skates away. </p><hr/><p>Andrew sat on Jeremy's couch while Laila and Sara were making out in one of the loveseats, Wilds and Boyd were outback, probably making out as well, and Jean, Jeremy, Sophia, Nicky,` and Renee were setting up the living room for a 'Slovie Night' which is what Sophia calls movie nights that end up with everyone staying the night.</p><p> </p><p>"Where's Neil?" Kevin asked as he came in from the kitchen, a bottle of vodka in his hands.</p><p> </p><p>"Kev," Jeremy said. "There are children present."</p><p> </p><p>He gestured towards Sophia who rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips: "I am NOT a child, dumbhead. I'm simply younger. By eight years. Also, NeNe's in his room. He likes it up there."</p><p> </p><p>"Dumbhead? Okay, lil' muffin. And NeNe?" Jeremy said, laughing.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, NeNe. He calls me SoSo, it's our thing."</p><p> </p><p>"That's so cute," Nicky said, tears brimming in his brown eyes. Andrew fought the urge to roll his eyes as he got up to head upstairs.</p><p> </p><p>"Where are you going, AnAn? It's Slovie Night," Sophia said. </p><p> </p><p>"NeNe," was all he said before going upstairs and knocking on Neil's door.</p><p> </p><p>"Who is it?" A robotic-sounding voice said from inside. Andrew knew that Neil had a text-to-speaker app on his phone but didn't know what it sounded like. Though, he supposed, it was conventional when you were in a house full of strangers and you didn't want them knowing what you really sounded like.</p><p> </p><p>"Drew."</p><p> </p><p>Several bolts unlocking sounded from the other side of the door and it opened to reveal auburn curls and too blue eyes that Andrew could drown in. Neil was in an LAHS hoddie and black sweatpants.</p><p> </p><p>"The sweatshirt?" Andrew asked as he made his way past Neil to survey his room, noticing how everything was neat and organized as if waiting for a room inspection at any moment. Past bruises long since healed, burned at the memories of fists and kicks after he and Neil had failed inspection, once. They'd forgotten to put their backpacks on their respective hooks and had switched them around; the bruises and pain had lasted for months afterward. Andrew was ten, Neil nine.</p><p> </p><p>"From my freshman year at Los Angeles High," he explained.</p><p> </p><p>“What was that like?”</p><p> </p><p>”High school,” Neil said as if it was answer enough, and it probably was.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew gestured to Neil for him to roll up his sleeves and when Neil tensed, Andrew knew it wasn’t going to be good. “Neil,” he said softly. </p><p> </p><p>“You first.”</p><p> </p><p>”I haven’t relapsed since I was placed with Bee.” Betsy Dobson—Bee—was Andrew’s latest foster mom. After juvie, when Andrew got out early and met Aaron and Luther Hemmick—his uncle and Nicky’s dad—he’d hated every moment of their company. </p><p> </p><p>Luther had denied that anything had ever happened to Andrew when he’d confided in him about Drake and Stephen and Michael. <br/>“What you experienced was a show of fatherly and brotherly love,” Luther had said to Andrew. </p><p> </p><p>Then, Andrew had gone “home” with Aaron and his mother, Tilda. Tilda had been a bit too fond of hitting Aaron for his liking so he staged a car accident like he’d done too many times before for Neil and Neil for him.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew had met Bee in therapy that Luther had forced him into and, after explaining that their mother was dead, their cousin was only three months older than the then fifteen-year-olds, Bee had said that she’d fostered children in the past and could take them in.</p><p> </p><p>It had been too good to be true, Andrew thought, but nearly a year later, things were good.</p><p> </p><p>"You sure you want to do this?" Andrew asked carefully, knowing how self-conscious Neil was about his body.</p><p> </p><p>Neil tugged down his sweatpants and took off his sweatshirt: "Yes."</p><p> </p><p>Neil stood there before Andrew in nothing but his boxers, holding out his arms to him. "Are you sure?" Andrew asked as he got to his knees. Neil nodded while he signed <em>Yes</em>. Neil spread his legs a bit and pulled up the line of his boxers. Several burns were on the inside of his thighs along with cuts on his abdomen and chest, where two scars now sit where his breasts used to. The scars, while healed, were stretched as if he trained before he was allowed to.</p><p> </p><p>Andrew stood, and handed Neil back his clothes: "You surgery scars?"</p><p> </p><p>"Nothing, just too early training, that's all."</p><p> </p><p>"The truth."</p><p> </p><p>"My foster brother. When I was resting from surgery, my foster parents had to go away for a work conference and left me with him."</p><p> </p><p>"Name," Andrew demands, his name settled in cold fury.</p><p> </p><p>"Johnson," Neil said. "Eric Johnson."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this fic is mostly fluff bc my other fic (so far) is a lot of angst and i kinda want to balance my works out, lmao. ofc there will be angst but i probably won't make it as much as NITRDITF (Night is the Raven, Day is the Fox)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Neil bonding w/ Jeremy, Nicky, &amp; Matt</p><p>and a bit of drama</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>would y’all look at that? an update that’s on time? I WOULD’VE NEVER THOUGHT *faints from shock*</p><p>tw’s: transphobia (t-slur, deadnaming, violence against a trans person [somewhat pre-meditated], refusal of one’s gender), homophobia (invalidation of same-sex attraction, mentioned use of the f-slur), discussion of how neil ended up in foster care, implied future and past rape</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Hey,” Jeremy said when Neil walked down the stairs towards him, backpack already shouldered.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Neil said, he’d only just begun talking in front of the Knoxs two nights ago and, so far, Neil was feeling good.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You ready for your first day?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Neil said honestly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ll be okay,” Jeremy said, smiling slightly. He made a ‘let’s go’ motion with his hand and brought them out to his car. Across the street, Nicky, Aaron, and Andrew are getting into Andrew’s GS.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Andrew! You never let me drive!” Nicky complained. Neil chuckled quietly from where he stood and watched as Andrew locked the door, flipped Nicky off, and look towards Neil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good luck,” Neil signed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“One hundred forty-nine percent,” he signed back. Neil laughed, causing Nicky to look over at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi, Neil!” He yelled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil flipped him off and got in the car, but not before hearing Nicky’s cries of dismay.</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“I am so insulted, Neil. I thought we were friends!” Nicky exclaimed as soon as Neil got out of the car in the parking lot.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t do friends,” he signed. Of course, Nicky or Aaron had yet to hear his voice besides that one time at the rink. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeremy clicked his tongue in disbelief: “If you don’t do friends, then what’s Andrew?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not his friend,” Andrew said, getting out of the driver’s seat, right next to Neil’s passenger seat as he parked next to them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, Andrew?” Neil signed. “What are we? Or, what am I to you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Everything. You’re everything to me,” Andrew signed as he said, “Nothing. Neil’s nothing to me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil smiled and signed, “You’re everything to me, too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“One hundred ninety-nine percent,” Andrew said, walking towards the entrance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Up by fifty percent already? I’m on a roll,” Neil laughed and followed him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I hate you. You can walk to your homeroom,” Andrew speed-walked into the building and down a hall.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shit,” Neal cursed below his breath and he ran up to his friend, only to find Andrew waiting for him near Andrew’s locker. “You were gonna wait either way, weren't you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t ask stupid questions,” he deadpanned but his hazel eyes were sparkling in amusement. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Your eyes are so beautiful. Especially when you’re happy or laughing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew pushed Neil’s face away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shut up and let’s go.”</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Matt said as Neil sat down at the Kits’ lunch table, between Andrew and Jeremy. Riko and Ichirou were on the opposite end of the table, far away from Jeremy’s friends, which Neil was grateful for. All Neil did in response was nod his head in acknowledgement which is more than he’s done for people at his past schools. “How’s your first day so far?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Boring,” Neil signed which Jeremy reciprocated with a small frown. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s just pissy because he hasn’t gotten into a fight yet,” Andrew interjected. “Nothing but trouble.” Neil elbowed him in the ribs which made the blond wince and send his own elbow into Neil’s side but he caught it and pushed it away from him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You two could literally continue this and I think he’d be fine,” Jean said, from where he was seated across from Jeremy.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Too much energy,” Neil signed, and Jeremy translated it for everyone at the table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How?” Allison asked. “You’re so… tiny.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s really adorable, by the way,” Sara cut in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Genetics?” Neil signed. “My birth mum’s family is really short.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm, it makes sense,” Laila said. “Though who do you get your looks from?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My birth father. Though, I don’t know how he got blue eyes and red hair when he’s Polish and Russian to the end.” He signed in British Sign Language, then Andrew, though reluctant, translated it for them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s how you know Russian? Oh! Do you know Polish?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Andrew said. “We learned Russian from one of our foster homes, but Neil does know Polish.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And Japanese, French, German, I could go on for a while,” Neil added on, signing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Japanese?” Seth questioned. Neil motioned towards the Moriyama brothers at the other end of the table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They were my first foster home. Well, technically my second sense I went to my uncle’s house in London first, but after he died I was sent back to the U.S and they were the closest thing to family friends, so, they took me in for a few months then I was flown to California where I met this bastard,” he signed, gesturing to Andrew.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dan and Matt frowned, “How’d you end up in the system anyways?” Dan asked, and Neil could tell she was genuinely curious and not trying to bring up bad memories but well, it was inevitable with this topic of conversation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My parents didn’t like that I was trans and so, when I came out to them at eight, they threw me out and put me on the first plane to London.”  Though when Neil realized he’d just come out to them, it was too late and, when he looked around the table anxiously, saw tears in some of the Kit’s eyes, and Nicky was full-on crying. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I told you not to make anyone cry today, idiot,” Andrew chastised him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not my fault?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew sent him a look that said he knew that already and was trying to break the tension which Neil already knew, of course, but sent a grateful smile to his friend either way.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why are parents always so shitty?” Matt asked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They’re not </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span> shitty,” Jeremy said, defending Adrian and Ruby. “Right, Neil?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They’re better than any foster parents I’ve ever had before.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, obviously</span>
  <b> your</b>
  <span> parents aren’t. Adrian and Ruby are darlings and deserve everything good in the world,” Nicky said, wiping away tears. “And I get you, Neil. My parents threw me out freshman year when I told them I was gay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“To bigoted parents?” Neil asked aloud and ignored the shock and smiles on the Kit’s faces as he hit his water bottle with Nicky’s. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Seth said as Neil walked out of his last period class of the day, jumping at the sound of the older man’s voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?” Neil asked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay?” Neil walked towards the entrance to wait by Andrew’s car for him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, so I just wanted you to know that like you being like transgender and all… its cool. Like it’s cool with me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is Nicky or any other Kit being gay cool with you?” Neil asked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What? No, its fucking weird and unnatural.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then I don’t fucking care if it’s ‘cool with you’ that I’m me. Not that I needed your validation anyways. Don’t accept a few members of the alphabet mafia if you’re going to invalidate others,” Neil told the homophobe before he walked away from Seth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fuck you!” Seth called and, before Neil could react, the former had him pinned against the lockers, his red face towering over Neil’s smaller stature. By that time,everyone had cleared out of the building and Andrew and Jeremy were no doubt waiting for him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Listen here you lil’ shit. I only said that shit because after you left, Allison went on a while tangent how we should accept you and treat you no differently than we did,” he spat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“However,” Seth continued. “I don’t see it that way. In fact, I think you’re just as much of a girl as Allison is. How the fuck does a guy not have a dick? Or a flat chest without surgery or those weird binders or whatever the fuck you fags call them? No that’s fucking weird and I’m not going to have a fucking tranny,” Neil flinched, “like you walking around these halls without consequence. Watch your back.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>With that, Seth punched Neil in the stomach before kneeing him in the eye and leaving in the opposite direction. It took Neil a few moments to catch his breath and somewhat slow his heart rate, he quickly left the school.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey!” Jeremy said excitedly as he caught sight of Neil before frowning. “Hey, what’s wrong?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing,” Neil lied. “I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then what the fuck happened to your face?” Andrew asked from behind Neil, making the younger man jump.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing,” Neil lied again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The truth.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Seth.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What’d he do?” Jeremy asked, his protective older brother mode switching on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let me guess,” Nicky said, revealing himself from the opposite side of Andrew’s car. Neil didn’t see Aaron anywhere and was silently grateful, from the few times they’ve interacted—which was very few and very far between—he was nothing but an asshole. “He said something, you defended yourself, he got pissed and decided to push you against the lockers and beat you up whole giving you a verbal tear down?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe,” Neil mumbled. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ugh he’s such a… such a parasite. Like those stomach parasites that come back year after year no matter how much you take antibiotics for them? Yeah, that’s Seth.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m gonna kill him,” Andrew said, no, promised.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil turned towards his friend and held his hands up between them: “Don’t. I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What’d he say to you?” Jeremy asked, concerned.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing I haven’t been called before,” Neil stated, nonplussed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil,” Jeremy practically pleaded.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was nothing,” Neil said and got into the passenger seat, ignoring the knowing look Andrew sent his way. Jeremy quickly followed Neil onto the car, going into the driver’s seat and starting the car.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I hope,” Jeremy began before he stopped and sighed. “I know, from what my dad has told me, the foster system isn’t kind; especially not to transgender children. Whatever you went through, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to but if you do, I’m here, and I want you to know that I’m not going to judge you for it. I want you to know that my parents are a safe source for you to talk to. My dad was a foster child and he went through a ton of shit that shouldn’t happen but it did and there’s nothing he or anyone else can do to change that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeremy took a breath and continued, “And if not me or my parents or hell even Sophia, you have Andrew and I know you too have history together,” Neil almost choked on his spit and rolled his eyes at Jeremy’s knowing look. “And I know he’s a strong support system for you, but his mom, Betsy, is a psychiatrist. She could help you, if you want, through anything you’ve gone through.I don’t know, I think you’ve got it handled but, if you need us, we’re here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know,” Neil said after moments of tense silence. “It’s just not easy to talk about.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I understand, but if you ever need anything, even if it’s not to talk, my door is always open.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Unless Jean’s there,” Neil said, smirking and laughed as Jeremy sputtered and burned red in embarrassment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What about Andrew then?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We don’t, have history, I mean.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You mean you two haven’t known each other since you were, what? Ten? Eleven?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ten years, eight months, three weeks, and two days old,” Neil said before he could top himself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My point, exactly! You even memorized the date the two of you met.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Neil denied. “I did not.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“When did you meet him, then?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Saturday, October 13, 2012. Shit,” Neil swore. “Fuck.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you like him? Like that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know. I mean he’s just really fucking goregous. Like how you describe Jean but so much more attractive. But no, we haven’t like done anything.” Nothing besides a few kisses.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey!” Jeremy said, faking offense. “No but Neil, in all seriousness, I’m happy, really happy, actually, that you have him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Me too,” Neil said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A few more moments of silence, peaceful this time, passed between them. “Do you want to talk about what Seth said to you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It really isn’t a big deal. He just… lightly threatened me and called me the t-slur,” Neil said, rushing the last part but he knew that Jeremy still heard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He did </span>
  <b>
    <em>what</em>
  </b>
  <span>?” Jeremy demanded.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Threatened me and called me the t-slur?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m gonna kill him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, Jere. Just, let me deal with it?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I- fine,” he sighed. “But if he does that shit again-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ll kill him, I know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anyways, how was your first day? The end of it aside.”</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>It did happen again, just not from Seth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Natalie,” Ichirou said to Neil in Japanese the next day during his free period. Neil was in the library, trying to get some of his biology homework done, and his past abuser just sat down next to him. His skin crawled at the proximity. “My bed was freezing without you last night. Join me tonight?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil froze and reluctantly turn his head to look at him. His onyx eyes were alight with something cruel and his obsidian hair was neatly combed to the side, just as it’d been four years ago.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Leave me alone,” he said in the same language.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But you’re so much fun. In and out of bed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thought you didn’t want to dirty yourself with a boy.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But you’re not a boy. You’re a tranny with some weird phase where suddenly, you think you’re a boy. Here’s the thing: Natalie, you are a girl. No boy has a vagina or a menstrual cycle.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil’s heart stumbled in its beat: he’d completely forgotten about his period which was due in a few days, he realized. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And you’re just a rapist with a pension for violence and daddy issues,” Neil told Ichirou before quickly gathering his things and booking out of the library.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil?” Matt asked, walking towards the library when Neil was coming out of it, a concerned look in his tan face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine,” Neil said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If Matt was surprised that Neil was </span>
  <b>speaking</b>
  <span> to him, he didn’t show it.“You sure? You look panicked.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just.. Yeah. I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay. Well, wanna hangout? I’m in my free right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Um, sure.” Matt began walking towards the library before Neil, panicky, spoke up: “How about we go to the football field and sit on the bleachers or something?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure but why not the library?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just you no it’s just so… quiet.” It was a lame excuse but, of course, it was all Neil could think about in the moment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, then. Yeah, let’s go.”</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“So,” Matt began as they sat down. “How’s everything so far? Anyone giving you problems? That bruise on your eye looks nasty.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just Seth and Ichirou, really, it’s nothing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Seth did that?” Matt gestured towards Neil’s face and, when Neil nodded, he swore. “Fuck. Dude I’m so sorry he’s such a fucking asshole and we’ve—Dan, Jeremy, Nicky, Jean, Alvarez and Laila—have been trying to get him off the team by telling out coach he’s ‘a bigoted asshole who knows nothing about sensitivity or triggers’ but he just punished him whenever he says a slur by benching him abd saying that he doesn’t allow those words at the rink.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Matt continued, “Like the other day, Nicky was making out with his boyfriend, Erik outside of the rink and Seth called them a bunch of f-slurs and coach told him to go and sit in his office until practice was over.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Isn’t the coach Kevin’s dad?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. But Kevin doesn’t care about whatever the fuck happens as long as nothing interferes with hockey. It’s annoying how one-tracked his mind is.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My one-tracked mind is skating. And math. And languages.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Math?” Matt made a disgusted face but quickly laughed. “Also, that's like a three-tracked mind. Not one.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Same thing?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Matt laughed. “It’s not but I appreciate the effort.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well then,” Neil huffed, “I will take my three-tracked mind and leave.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait!” Matt said, faking hurt and surprise. “Don’t leave me,” he cried obnoxiously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil snorted and sat down. “You think you’re so funny, don’t you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I am. I know I am.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Confident or cocky?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Confident.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll see about that, Matthew Donovan Boyd.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes we will..” Matt trailed off and looked at Neil expectantly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Abram Josten. Neil Abram Josten.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then, yes we will Neil Abram Josten.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hii omg i- NEIL AND NICKY MY BABIES </p><p> </p><p>SOME OF MY FAV FRIENDSHIPS ARE STARTING TO FORM SO LIKE LET ME INDULGE MYSELF IF THEM PLS</p><p> </p><p>anyways, thank you for reading! i love y’all so much.</p><p>as always, kudos and comments/feedback are greatly appreciated and i try to respond to as many ppl as possible🤍</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>andreil fluff, jereil (jeremy + neil) brotherly fluff, some kit fluff, and a very lil' bit of angst.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hiii LOOK AT THAT.. a chapter ready for upload right on time? i don't believe it. </p><p>no, lmao, i don't either but here i am, writing the draft for the chapter a day before im meant to upload it so it can be ready for upload the next day. </p><p>trigger warnings: rather descriptive mention of periods / menstrual cycles, mention of (period) blood, vomiting, mention of gender dysphoria, mention of past transphobia, mentions of rapist (but nothing explicit, it's just mentioned in passing towards the end)</p><p>so, yeah enjoy?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Neil’s menstrual cycle came two days later, on a Friday, thankfully. He woke up feeling shitty and knew, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> that the next four to seven days were going to be </span>
  <b>hell</b>
  <span>. See, the thing about his menstrual cycles was that, while regular, didn’t last for the same amount of days every time and it was a gamble if he was going to be bleeding for two days, or a week. Nonetheless, he hated it. From the cramps to the vomiting to the bleeding. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Especially</span>
  </em>
  <span> the bleeding.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil?” Jeremy asked, knocking on his bathroom door where Neil was vomiting into the toilet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?” Neil asked after a bit, spitting into the toilet and flushing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You okay?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just my… you know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Understanding dawned across Jeremy’s face and he nodded, a small and almost sympathetic smile across his lips, “Got it. Do you want to stay home? My dad used to have to spend the first few days of his cycle at home, he was too dysphoric to leave.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, if that’s okay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeremy smiled again, a brighter and more reassuring smile. “Of course, you can stay home. I don’t know how it was in past homes, and frankly, I don’t want to otherwise I might fly to California and punch them,” he chuckled at his own joke. “But, you can stay home for as long as it lasts, if you want. My parents will understand.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay…” Neil said. “Thanks.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to thank us, Neil.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil didn’t reply and Jeremy shut the door behind him quietly. He did have to thank them, though, for everything, at least he thought he did. Rebecca would’ve gently told him that no, he didn’t have to thank them; and he didn’t. He didn’t because Eric was there and Eric was, Eric was a barrier and an obstacle that blocked Neil from having the only thing he’d ever truly </span>
  <b>
    <em>wanted</em>
  </b>
  <span> for himself; a family. But the Knoxs, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> have to thank. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For housing him and understanding him, for feeding him and providing him clothes that were masculine and affirmed his gender. A few days ago, Adrian had even given Neil a sweatshirt that Adrian had said he’d had since he was a teen and came out as transgender to his adoptive parents who didn’t understand but were willing to learn.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was the first article of masculine clothing I’d ever worn,” Adrian had said when he gave Neil the box. “And, I want you to have it because I know that as amazing and euphoric as it is to have others call you by your correct pronouns and your chosen name, it can still be hard to feel yourself. And I’ve learned that I’ve never felt more euphoric than being given this sweatshirt by a trans male I knew from an LGBT center I volunteered at.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I,” Neil had begun to say, but what could he say? He couldn’t say anything against the lump in his throat and the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. “Thank you,” he’d said thickly at last. “For everything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course, Neil. And if you ever need anything, any of us are here for you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know,” Neil had said and didn’t even realize until now that he </span>
  <b>meant</b>
  <span> it. He knew now that, even though it’d only been a little over a month, none of the Knoxs would hurt him and his only threats were the Moriyamas and Seth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Knoxs were becoming a family to him; a place where he could belong and it hit Neil like a truck. He could belong because, maybe, he could belong. He wanted this, this family, and he knew that if there was such a thing as God, he’d be able to keep them in the end.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Where’s Neil?” Andrew asked, locking his front door behind him. Only Knox was leaving the house across the street today.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sick,” Jeremy said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew raised a spectacle brow, Neil didn’t get sick, at least not very often. He crossed the street and stood in front of the taller man. “The truth, Neil doesn’t get sick.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know if he’d want me to tell you the truth,” the blond said sheepishly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew ran through a list of what </span>
  <b>that</b>
  <span> could mean in his head and came up with only a few options. “His cycle?” He questioned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Um, yeah-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Take Nicky and Aaron to school,” he said and walked to the door and walked in without preamble, ignoring Jeremy’s questions from the driveway. “Neil!” Andrew called as he closed the door behind him. He knew that both of Knox’s parents went to work early on the weekdays and Sophia was at her friend’s house so she could be brought to school.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil?” Andrew called again, going upstairs towards Neil’s room. “It’s Andrew.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know who you are, dipshit,” came a muffled voice from behind a door next to Neil’s. “You can come in,” he said. Carefully, Andrew opened the door and saw Neil sitting in the bathtub, water rushing in. At his puzzled look, Neil said, “It stops the bleeding for a while. And it feels nice.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Talk to me?” Andrew requested. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“About what?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Whatever you want,” Andrew said softly, and gently ran his fingers through Neil’s hair. “Can I cut your hair later? It’s getting long.” Andrew knew that Neil loved having his hair cut, the shorter the better. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Neil said eagerly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You can cut my hair afterward, I hate it when it gets this long.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know,” he said, bringing his hand to Neil’s nape. “I know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So,” Neil said. “There’s this new routine I want to try.”</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Neil? Andrew?” Jeremy asked when he walked in the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?” Neil asked from the couch, lifting his head off of Andrew’s shoulder. “What’s up?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just making sure you two were okay. Um, some of my friends wanted to know how you were doing. They wanted to come over but I said it probably wasn’t a good idea.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine,” Neil said. “Just tired.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” he smiled and handed Neil a pile of books and paper. “Here’s your homework.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I missed all of this?” Neil paled and felt Andrew stir from beside him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Missed all of what?” Andrew asked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not all of this, half of it is yours and the other half is Andrew’s.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” Neil sighed in relief and handed half of the pile to his friend. “Here’s your homework.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fuck this,” he said sleepily but took his books nonetheless. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeremy laughed, “I’m heading to the rank with some of my friends if you wanted to join us at any point.” He took a sip of his water and seemed to think for a moment. “Though, I said you were sick and Andrew was here to watch you and make sure you didn’t contaminate everything,” Neil and Andrew let out twin offended scoffs. “So actually, by coming with me, you’d prove that I was lying and- you know what? Stay here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gladly,” Andrew said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright,” Jeremy said. “Leaving you two alone now,” he gave a knowing look to Neil who narrowed his eyes in the most convincing glare he could muster. Jeremy had the fucking audacity to laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Weren’t you going to the rink?” Neil asked venomously. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” the taller man chuckled and left. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s fucking annoying,” Andrew said as Neil placed his head back in its original place on the blond’s shoulder. He lifted his arm so Neil could get closer and bring the blanket over the pair. “We’re not doing our homework now, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bloody hell, no.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Andrew snorted and played another movie that neither were paying attention to.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sleep, then,” Andrew said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You too,” Neil yawned.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey!” Nicky said on Saturday when Neil joined them at the rink. Neil said nothing other than knocking his head in acknowledgment. “How’re you feeling?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Better,” Neil said, somewhat true.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’re glad to have ya back, buddy,” Matt said, ruffling Neil’s freshly cut hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why is it always the hair that people go for?” Neil grumbled as he ran his hands through his auburn curls, fixing it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sara laughed, “Because you’re so short it’s the easier thing for people to see.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> small, especially not compared to </span>
  <b>you</b>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Laila sucked in a breath between her teeth, Jean’s eyes widened in shock, and Jeremy </span>
  <em>
    <span>tsk</span>
  </em>
  <span>ed his tongue. “You- I love you!” Sara said. “You are my new favorite. Neil’s my new favorite and you </span>
  <b>all</b>
  <span> suck ass.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?” Laila laughed, offended. “But he insulted you!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Exactly why he’s my new favorite! He’s got guts and I applaud that,” she said before turning back towards Neil. “But, insult me again and I’ll have your head, understand?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, ma’am,” Neil said and gave her a two-finger mocking salute before walking off towards the figure skating rink to practice his new routine he’d told Andrew about the other day.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neil knew that, logically, he was being utterly illogical. Looking over his shoulder and staying as small as can manage to avoid either Moriyama brother’s or Seth’s attention was idiotic and cowardly; but, he didn’t really care. He just </span>
  <b>needed</b>
  <span> to feel safe, to feel at home; where Palmetto was beginning to feel until he saw the Moriyama's. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Home. Love. Family. Truthfully, it was all Neil wanted and needed because he knew that, if he had it, he would never let it go.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Home. Love. Family. It was all he needed.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i hope you enjoyed it. i don't know if you can tell or not but this has no (solid) plot and im kinda just.. going along a plot that doesn't exist. </p><p>but um, hey? lots of fluff this way, yeah?</p><p>lmao, i love y'all. as always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. *NOT A CHAPTER*</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>sorry :(</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>hey guys, i’m so sorry but due to school and recent developments in my private life, i’m going to be putting this story on a hiatus at the moment. </p><p>i just don’t have enough time with school, my other wip’s, and just everything, i don’t have enough time to write all of my stories.</p><p> </p><p>love you all, and see you soon. </p><p>-haleigh🤍</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I’m really excited for this story, lol. </p><p>Comments and Kudos are greatly appreciated.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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